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Sunday, October 21, 2007

Not walking

Now I get to ask a lot of people to leave. About half take the verbal invite and start walking.

The other half don't. When a punter is on a private licensed premises and they are asked to leave they really should get themselves together and go. The arm indicating which way to walk and the other behind ensuring they don't disappear in the wrong direction entirely usually works.

For a small minority something more is needed. I'm not small, though I'm finding my centre of gravity is a little too high nowadays. That's for another post though. When I apply myself to move someone, they move. It may not be pretty but with an arm in my grasp, I can usually twist, turn or pull it enough to make someone leave at an accelerated speed if needed.

If someone pulls both arms tight in, plants their feet and sets themselves rigid, I might have to pull out the dirty tricks. The funniest one of which is to push one way 'til they shift their feet, then get out the way as they slam themselves to the floor struggling to get their arms out in time. This works well to humiliate as well as surprise them. It also leaves them prone, with big me standing above them. Most can then just be picked up and carried down the nearest fire exit.

Most give up the fight and walk before we get to the top step. I could only imagine why, it's as if they don't trust us not to drop them headfirst on the hard concrete stairs.

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